Weddings are a lot. A lot of money, a lot of feelings and emotions, and a typically a lot of people. Introverts and Empaths are prone to additional stress and anxiety leading up to Wedding Day but I am here to help you out with some advice to avoid emotional burn out.
Who am I? My name is Steph (she / her) and I’m an LGBTQ+ Wedding Photographer who has been in the industry since 2012. I also happen to be an Empath & a major introvert so I attract a lot of Couples just like me. So here are a few ideas to help battle your Wedding anxiety.
Do what you want, it’s YOUR Wedding Day. If you follow me on Social Media you have definitely heard me say this time and time again. I mean it and it’s literally how 99% of my Couples approach their Wedding Day. I know your loved ones are probably very opinionated and have their own ideas of what they want your Wedding Day to be…. but I’m here to tell you that you do not have to compromise your vision. Your loved ones will get over it. They just want to be heard, so honor their ideas in some way but ultimately do what you want.
Meet with your potential vendors. I know this might seem opposite of introvert, but you want to get to know most of your vendors pretty well before your Wedding. Especially your Photo / Video / Planner. If meeting in person isn’t your thing, ask for a zoom call. This will give you an overall idea of their personality and if you’ll feel comfortable with them for 8+ hours on Wedding Day. Choose vendors you can see becoming friends with and you’ll be surrounding yourself with the best energy.
Choose your Wedding Party wisely. I’ve seen it all too often where Couples choose the wrong friends and end up losing that friendship during or after the Wedding. Really consider whose energy you want around you on Wedding Day. Do not just pad your Wedding Party for the sake of a body. Only choose your absolute favorite people who are going to support you, believe in your relationship and won’t make the day about them.
Pad your timeline with extra time. I love adding in 15 extra minutes to EVERYTHING. This allows the Wedding Day to flow without it feeling so rigid. This gives space for down time, deep breaths, grounding and bathroom breaks. Couples that have this extra time don’t feel super rushed and it just makes for a more enjoyable Wedding experience.
Eloping might be a better option. This might be controversial but it could also alleviate family fights and drama. If you truly do not want an audience as you marry your partner, eloping might be the best way to avoid the stage fright. You can absolutely adore your family and friends but their energy might be a lot for you. There is absolutely nothing wrong with Eloping without them. There are so many ways you can choose to include them in the Elopement without them actually being there.
Keep it intimate. If eloping is not a possibility for you, consider having an intimate Wedding. Half of the Weddings I document are under 50 guests. Keeping the guest list down to only your closest friends and family can definitely help your anxiety.
Create your own traditions. If some of the older Wedding Traditions make you cringe – don’t do them. Add in your own personal touches. Things you’ve seen at your friend’s Weddings, newer traditions that align with your values and maybe fun things you’ve seen online. For instance – if you are not a fan of the bouquet toss… opt for something different. It could be centered around Animal Rescue, the Environment, etc. You can also incorporate other fun activities like Wedding Games or Karaoke!
Private Moments. If you are too emotional for public speaking, consider doing private vows together vs. during your ceremony in front of everyone. Doing a first look will also be a huge advantage – you won’t be as nervous and you have that moment with each other, not everyone. I understand how vulnerable these moments can be, keeping them for yourselves (and your photographer) makes all the difference.
Communicate!!! Let your vendors know about any strained relationships with family or anything that might help your emotional well-being. Communicating these details will definitely avoid any tense situations from occurring.
I love working with Empaths and Introverts because we speak the same language. I hope these Wedding Planning tips are useful in your journey to Wedding Day!
© Tiny House Photo 2023